Should I Get Back With My Ex? Pros and Cons

should i get back with my ex

These days most people tend to be confused on whether or not it is a good idea to get back with your ex.

This decision largely depends on how the previous relationship ended and if you can bare to deal with your exes good and bad qualities.  For instance, “a chic who cheats on her boyfriend tends to be a higher take back liability risk than a chic who had some negligible deal breaker or just required to grow up.” says Fritz Galette a family therapist.

Some people would argue it is never a good idea to take your ex back because the excitement and newness lacks the second time around. Other’s would argue it is nothing like the familiar scent and comfort you get your ex in comparison to starting a new relationship.

No matter which side you agree with, let’s review a few pros and cons that will help you answer the question, should I get back with my ex?

Should I Get Back with my Ex Pros

There is no place like home

Getting back together with your ex is like that feeling you get when move away from home then come back to visit after a long period of time. Everything is warm and welcoming. The scent of the house if familiar, you know where everything is and the people you love are there.  The fact that you already know and understand your ex makes it easy to pick back up where you left off.

You already have time invested

Think about all the time you spent molding you ex into the person you wanted them to be.  You taught them how to be sensitive, caring and so much more. Are you ready to let another person reap the benefits of your hard work? Not to mention, starting a new relationship can be exhausting. You have to start everything from scratch and it still may not work out.

They are your perfect match

Take a minute to reflect on your ex. Did you have great chemistry despite the issues? Did you feel like he or she was your perfect match?  Finding a partner that is compatible is on of the biggest challenges in a relationship.  If you have found someone that fits you like a puzzle piece, it might be a good idea to work it out.

Should I Get Back With My Ex Cons

Things will never change
Sometimes you have to accept the fact that your ex is going to be nothing more than who they currently are.  They are not going to work on fixing the things that often bothered you the most. They have no interest in bettering themselves and they are only looking to take advantage of you.  As bad as it may hurt, move on if you know this is the case about your ex.

You are doing it for the wrong reasons

When you are comfortable in a relationship it is easy to stay even when you know there is no future in it. Some people get back with their ex partners to fill voids (loneliness, emotional support, sex). Make sure your motivation for getting back with your ex is for the right reason. Make sure you have a genuine interest in being with the person for who they are.

They might end up breaking your heart again
Obviously, if your ex broke your heart the first time, it is no secret they are capable of doing it again. Make sure you have taken time to heal from the first breakup. Are you prepared to deal with the possibility of another heartbreak?

They may take you for granted
Depending on who was primarily responsible for the breakup, getting back with your ex may cause them to take you for granted.  If they cheated on you or walked all over your heart before and you take them back. What message does it send? Are you sure they are going to have respect for you going forward?


As you wrestle with the question “Should i Get Back with my ex” it is important that you keep the above points in mind so that you make an informed decision. Don’t be afraid to speak with a professional that can further assist you in making this decision.

Additional Resources

If you decide you would like to get back with your, check out my proven 5 step guide called how to get my ex boyfriend back.  This article was written for my female readers, but a lot of the points equally apply to men looking to reconnect with ex girlfriend.

Also, check out my review on several top selling relationship products that have helped thousands of men and women make up with their exes.

Lastly, click here for an answer to the question, can exs be friends after break up?